Shadow Heart ( A Shadow and Bone Fanfic)
by typowriter99
Summary: A Shadow and Bone short-story fanfic about the Darkling's past life. In a time when the he carried a different name, the Darkling had been in love once. A tragic tale that changed his life forever. This short story does not contain spoilers from Ruin and Rising.


"_Murderer! Monster!" _Alina's voice rang in the Darkling's head as Ivan dragged her out of his tent. A surge of memories filled his head. Those where very familiar words to him._ Murderer! __Monster!_

She was in the meadow, hands outstretched in front of her, summoning a ring of fire. Her long brown hair dishevelled as the wind blows through it. He creeped up behind her, slipping his hands around her waist. He summoned thin black coils of darkness and it whirled around her fiery ring. She turned her head to face him and a smile crept onto her lips. He leaned forward, pressing his forehead against hers. Their noses brushing. Her smile widened. "You know how much I hate being disturbed while I practice", she said playfully as she escaped his embrace. She giggled and ran, turning her head back only to give him a mischievous smile. He chased her all the way to edge of the meadow. Then he trapped her in an embrace, lifted her up and whirled her around. She was still giggling like a little girl after he set her back down. She wrapped her arms around his neck and brought his lips down onto hers. They laid down on the meadow together, her head resting against his chest. He summoned a thick cloud of darkness above them while she summoned tiny specks of embers so that it resembled a beautiful starry night. He took her hand in his, bringing his lips to the ring on her finger. "This day next week", he whispered into her eyes."I shall have the privilege of calling you my wife." That was easily the best day of his life.

_Murderer! __Monster! _The Darkling remembered that day as if it were yesterday. He woke up at the break of dawn to go to the woods. He practiced summoning darkness in the shade of the trees. His mother had always told him to be careful when summoning. _"They'll cut you open like a frog or burn you like a witch!"_, she'd always warn him. His mother didn't like his fiancee very much. She says that she makes him act careless and foolish. And she would always warn him how it only takes one second of foolishness for him to be caught. He just brushed her off. His mother tended to be overprotective. It was because she had to raise him all by herself at such a young age, constantly having to watch over their shoulders for the white bearded Fjerdan men who would burn them at the stake or the stealthy dark haired Shu Han men who would dissect them to learn more about their gifts.

When the sun was high above the trees, he decided to pay his fiancee a visit. He gathered some flowers from the meadow behind his house and made his way to her cottage. When he arrived, he knocked the door gently. Nobody answered. He knocked again then pushed the door open. "Hello" he called out. "Anybody home?" He walked to the kitchen but found it empty. Then he went outside through the back door to see if she was doing laundry. He started to feel worried when he found it empty as well. He went back in side the house feeling puzzled. Maybe she went into town, he thought to it is unusual for his fiancee to leave the house without locking the doors. Just as he was about to leave the door, he heard noises coming from upstairs. A loud thud followed by shouting. His eyes went wide with fear and he dropped the flowers in his hands, trampling them as he raced up the wooden staircase. She's in trouble, he thought to himself. Somebody is hurting her or worse. Those thoughts swarmed his head as he slammed the door open with a loud thud.

The scene before his eyes left him frozen in his shoes. His fiancee stared at him, wide eyed, hastily trying to cover herself with the sheets. There was a man in her bed, nobody he recognised. In that moment, he felt as if he were detached from his body, watching the scene from above without emotion. And then it hit him like a tidal wave. First betrayal, stinging like poison in his body, then anger fuming from his soul then hurt and sadness and heart-break. So much emotion all at once. She rushed to him, the sheets trailing behind her as she walked. There were tears in her eyes and her lips were moving but he could hear nothing save for the buzzing in his ears. He did not care about what she had to say. He tried to push her away as he walked to the man who had ruined his life but she was still in front of him, begging him, her mouth forming the words _I'm sorry _over and over again._ B_efore he could stop himself, he lashed out his hand and hit her. She stumbled away from him, hands to her face. He didn't care though. He only cared about the man standing in front of him. He was going to make him man stood up in front of him, his hands balled up ready for a fight. He felt something cold and dark bubbling in side of him, something he had never felt before. He lifted both his arms up, summoning the darkness like a thick fog. He registered confusion in the man's face. There was something else there too; something that could only be depicted as fear. A humourless smile crept onto his lips. Good, he thought, let him be afraid. He lifted one of his arms and sliced it downward. Then the darkness disappeared and a scream shattered the buzzing in his ears.

There, lying in front of him was the man's severed body. His whole right side from head to leg was lying on the floor while his left side lay stranded in mid air before falling on the floor with a loud thud. His ex-fiancee was still screaming hysterically. He had never done anything like that before and as far as he knew, nobody had. His body was buzzing with energy from using his powers. The weight of what just happened finally hit him. "What have I done?", he whispered to himself. Then his eyes fell on her. As soon as she realised he was looking at her, she started crawling away from him until her back hit her wall and she had nowhere else to go. Her eyes went wide with terror, there was fear written all over her face. She let out another high-pitched scream. "_Murderer!",_ she shouted. "_Monster!"_

He couldn't breathe. He couldn't think. He ran. He ran away from the room, from the cottage. He ran until he reached his own home. When he slammed the door open, his mother stared at him in shock. Just by looking at him, she knew something bad had happened. "Mother-", he whispered quietly. She did not do anything. She had not said anything. She just started packing.

They travelled in the darkness that his mother had summoned, invisible among the shadows of the forest. They took only what was necessary and set out as fast as they could on horseback. They rode swiftly and only stopped to make camp when the moon had risen high above the trees, miles away from the small village that was once their home. He had filled his mother in on what had happened while they were travelling. She had responded to him with silence which he found was much harder to bare than if she had been outraged. They made camp at a small clearing in the forest. They did not risk a fire while camping for the fear of being spotted. He huddled in his woollen coat, the autumn air had a tinge of iciness to it.

"We head east", his mother finally spoke. "To one of the small villages near the mountainside." He only nodded, not daring to look into her eyes, fearing the shame he'll find in them. He took a deep breathe and worked up the courage to speak. He needed to say something, anything. "I'm-" He was interrupted by a loud crack of thunder followed by a puff of smoke in the centre of the clearing. An old woman emerged from the smoke. She was skinny and gaunt, her back slightly hunched and her raven hair had streaks of grey. She approached him. His mother rushed to his side, shielding him with herself. "Suli witch", she whispered so only he could hear.

His mother had warned him about witches. She had told him that witches practice _merzost,_ the Ravkan word for magic. Coincidentally _merzost_ also meant abomination in Ravkan. "Stay back", his mother warned. "We mean you no harm."

"It is too late", the witch said with a hint of a Suli accent. "The boy killed my son. His blood will forever stain his hands." As the witch drew closer, he observed that her eyes had no pupils but were instead filled with grey clouds. "Saints", he swore under his breath. The old women began muttering a chant, as she drew closer her chanting got louder. "Stand back", she shouted to his mother. "This is not your fight."

"Please", she begged. "Don't hurt him. He's young, foolish and heartbroken. He didn't mean to, he can't control his gift just yet."

The witch ignored her and turned to him. "You ripped my son away from me. Now you'll learn how it is like to have your heartbroken forever. Your love will be reborn to you again and again. And every single time you fall in love with her, she will betray you once more." The old witch cast something into the ground and then vanished into thin air. Her words echoed in his head. _Your love will be reborn to you again and again. And every single time you fall in love with her, she will betray you once more._

The witch didn't lie. A year later, he met a girl who had the exact same face his fiancee did. He fell in love with her but she cheated on him. It happened again after three years. Then five, then ten. Even after he abandoned his name and became the Darkling, the curse never stopped. The girl would come in different names, with different backgrounds but always Grisha. Sometimes she was Coporalnik, sometimes Etherealki or Materialki. The Darkling learned to harden his heart. To kill her before he could even fall in love with her. But the most recent caught him by surprise. It had happened decades after the last, just when he was starting to hope that the curse might be over. When he saw her face, he knew it was not. And when he found out that she was a Sun Summoner, he laughed, thinking it must be some cruel joke from the witch. For he had been searching for a Sun Summoner for a very long time; he would never risk killing her just because she had the face of a past lover. The Darkling wasn't worried, for he had years upon years of practice to harden his heart. There was no way a little orphan girl was going to be stealing it away.

The Darkling stared after Alina. No there was no way for this girl to steal his heart. It had stopped working years ago. And yet, why did her betrayal sting so much?


End file.
